The term “sex positive” can have many definitions. For many, it involves having a positive attitude towards sex and feeling comfortable with one’s own sexual identity. For others, it involves being nonjudgmental and respectful of the diversity of sexuality and gender expressions.
We encourage you to create your own definition of what it means to you. Below are some traits that sex positive people tend to hold.
1. A constant desire to learn. Sex-positive people are open to learning more about sex. They want to understand themselves, their bodies and [if they have one] their partners’ bodies.
2. Acceptance of all. Sex-positivity accepts all practices without moral judgement, as long as it is safe and consensual. This also means accepting all sexual orientations and lifestyles.
3. Realistic expectations. Those who are sex-positive recognize that they (and their partners) can go through seasons of desire, and that they won’t always want to have sex.
4. A belief that sex is multi-dimensional. Sex can sometimes be just sex. However, there can also be many interconnected aspects – physical, emotional, psychological – involved with intimacy.
5. Sex is good for well-being. Sex-positive people understand that sex is a part of overall wellness, and something that is good for both the body and mind.
Being sex-positive can be complex and require some deep reflection on your own values and cultural beliefs. For some, it’s a journey to become sex positive following past experiences and for others, it’s a shift to being more open. At Rae, we are on a mission to remove shame and judgement from conversations about sex.